.Editor's Note: The observing is the text of a letter coming from Exploration 3 Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Retired), reflecting on the activities of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't composed significantly about specifics of this particular goal during the course of the month I've been below, mostly for pair of main reasons: the very first being that there has been actually really little bit of time to carry out that type of composing, as well as second of all considering that I'm not exactly sure how comfortable I am discussing thoughts I show to friends and family with the remainder of the world.Properly, clearly the world transformed today. What I point out or carry out is actually very slight reviewed to the implication of what took place to our country today when it was assaulted by ... through whom? Revolutionaries is all we know, I presume. Hard to recognize at whom to drive our temper and also fear ...I had actually only completed a number of tasks this morning, one of the most time-consuming being actually the physical examinations of all crew members. In a private conversation complying with that, the flight doctor told me they were actually possessing an extremely bad time on the ground. I possessed no idea ...He described the circumstance to me as best he knew it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was thrown for a loop, at that point horrified. My initial thought was actually that this wasn't a genuine talk, that I was still paying attention to some of my Tom Clancy strips. It simply didn't appear feasible on this scale in our nation. I could not also picture the details, also prior to the information of more damage started can be found in.Vladimir came pretty swiftly, sensing that something incredibly severe was being actually talked about. I swung Michael into the module as well. They were also amazed and stunned. After we signed off, I attempted to explain to Vladimir and Michael as best I might the possible magnitude of this show of fear in midtown Manhattan as well as at the Government. They accurately comprehended and also were incredibly sympathetic.I eyed the Planet Map on the computer system to see where over the globe our experts were as well as saw that our company were coming southeast out of Canada and would be actually passing over New England in a couple of minutes. I zoomed around the station until I found a window that will give me a sight of NYC as well as grabbed the closest camera. It took place to become a video camera, and also I was appearing southern coming from the window of Michael's cabin.The smoke cigarettes seemed to have an odd bloom to it at the foundation of the column that was streaming south of the urban area. After reading through among the news articles our experts simply obtained, I feel we were actually taking a look at NY around the amount of time of, or even quickly after, the failure of the second high rise. How awful ...I swept the camera all along the East Shore to the south to find if I could possibly find any other smoke around Washington, or even anywhere else, however nothing at all was visible.It was actually fairly challenging to consider work after that, though our experts possessed some to accomplish, but on the following track our team went across the US more southern. All 3 people were actually operating a couple of electronic cameras to make an effort to receive views of New York or even Washington. There was actually fog over Washington, yet no particular resource can be observed. Everything looked awesome from 2 to 3 hundred miles away. I can not picture the awful settings on the ground.Aside from the emotional impact of our country being dealt with and also countless our consumers as well as maybe some good friends being killed, the best mind-boggling emotion being where I am is one of solitude.Upcoming time ... I presume the exhaustion as well as psychological strain got the very best of me. I could not keep awake and remain to write. Today was actually still hard, but our team started receiving additional details, plus our company had the respect of speaking directly with the Center Director, Roy Estess, that guaranteed us that the ground staffs would certainly continue to function and guarantee our safety and security, in addition to the secure operation of the Station. We also talked to our Supervisor, Mr. Goldin, who incorporated that the partners in the Plan are all entirely dedicated to carrying on risk-free functions and assistance. These were actually never ever concerns for me. I recognize all these folks! The ground crews have actually been extremely supporting, quite understanding of the influence of the headlines, and have made an effort to be as valuable as achievable. They have actually all been extremely qualified and centered though I can not picture the distraction of this particular kind of headlines being available in and also the thought and feelings that federal government structures could be at risk. They never bypassed a beat, even when moving control centers. And also a team of senior staffs and also friends provided our team a fairly in depth instruction about what was understood as well as what was actually being actually performed in the government and at NASA on Tuesday mid-day, which was actually very handy as well as type of all of them to carry out in the middle of all the distress. The Russian TsUP has actually also been actually supporting as well as handy, attempting to uplink newspaper article when our own properties were actually unusable, as well as saying kind terms ...My crewmates have actually been actually excellent, too. They know it's been a challenging day for me and the individuals on the ground, as well as they've tried to be as even keeled as well as valuable as achievable. Michael even repaired me my beloved Borscht soup for dinner. And also they give me loads of area to presume when I needed it. They are quite sympathetic and also certainly shocked at whoever would perform this.I know a lot of people in Washington, plenty of people who travel to DC as well as New York City, so many who are actually pilots, that I felt certain I would certainly obtain at the very least a couple of pieces of trouble over the following handful of days. I got the first one today when I found out that the Captain of the American Airlines plane that attacked the Pentagon was Chic Burlingame, a schoolmate of mine. I encountered Chic during the course of cadet summer when our company were in the D&B together, and also our company had bunches of classes with each other. I can not visualize what he needs to of gone through, and also currently I listen to that he might possess increased further than our experts can easily also think about through perhaps stopping his aircraft coming from being the one to deal with the White Property. What a horrendous loss, however I make certain Chic was combating bravely to the end. And rips don't flow the exact same in space ...It's hard to explain how it experiences to be the only American totally off the planet at a time such as this. The sensation that I need to be there along with every one of you, coping with this, assisting in some way, is actually frustrating. I recognize that our company get on the threshold (or past) of a dreadful change in the record of the world. Numerous factors are going to never be the same once again after September 11, 2001. Certainly not merely for the manies thousand and hundreds of folks directly impacted by these horrendous acts of terrorism, yet possibly for everybody. Our experts will definitely locate ourselves really feeling in a different way regarding lots of things, including most likely area expedition, regrettably.It is actually dreadful to observe smoke putting from wounds in your own country coming from such an awesome perspective. The duality of performing a space capsule devoted to enhancing live on the planet and enjoying lifestyle being actually damaged by such premeditated, terrible acts is jolting to the subconscious, despite who you are. As well as the knowledge that everything will certainly be various than when our team launched by the time our company land is a little bit of disconcerting. I have confidence in our country as well as in our leadership that our experts will definitely perform everything achievable to far better safeguard her as well as our loved ones, and also to take fair treatment of what has been actually performed. I possess confidence that the great people at NASA are going to perform every little thing necessary to proceed our mission securely as well as return us safely and securely at the right time. As well as I miss out on each one of you significantly. I can not be there along with you personally, and our team have a long way to head to complete our objective, however be actually certain that my center is along with you, as well as know you are in my requests.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An update to the final letter ... Thankfully, it is actually been an occupied full week up listed below. And also to verify that, like our country, our team are actually continuing our designated path with company customarily (as long as feasible). Tonight the most recent enhancement to the station, the Russian Docking Compartment will certainly be actually released coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday night (United States time), it will dock along with our company, at a slot never ever made use of before on the low point side of the Service Component. This new component will definitely provide us yet another location to dock a Progression or even Soyuz and also will certainly offer a sizable airlock along with two able to be used hatches for performing EVA's in Russian Orlan fits, which our experts will definitely do a few of prior to we get home.The complication before in handling today was too little information. The problem today is too much. It arrived at one time when email was actually rejuvenated, and there's insufficient opportunity to review it all! Plus it is actually also difficult to deal with all of it at the same time. But I value getting it, and I truly enjoy the great letters of assistance as well as companionship I am getting.We are actually doing well on board, getting our work carried out, and discussing factors. Last evening our company possessed a lengthy discussion over dinner about the value of these activities, the achievable activities to adhere to, as well as what need to be actually performed. After dinner, Michael challenged informing me that every email he got coming from close friends in Russia mentioned particularly to inform me exactly how sorry they were that this happened, stretching their acknowledgements, as well as talking to exactly how I was carrying out. Vladimir taught me the Russian term for "acknowledgements" after consulting with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Celebrity Urban area. (Both the Russian and the English terms are a lot very long to pronounce quickly.) Very type people.For the last 2 times, the Russian MCC has actually sufficed to transmit online shows of broadcast information regarding the event and also associated stories, to be sure I was properly notified. Every expert that has actually come on the line to review a technique or even an issue contends some factor expanded introductions to me along with kind terms. Tonight the Russian capcom told our team that because of the wedding of recognition in the US, all day folks had been actually carrying florals and also lining all the wall surfaces of the US consular office in Moscow, and this evening they were actually lighting candles in the street outside the embassy. How the planet has actually modified.Folks just about everywhere appear to realize the senselessness and also terror within this attack. As well as the incredible loss. Moscow has actually dealt with these sort of issues in the last couple of years along with home as well as train bombings, so they are actually as anxious to remove this hazard as our team are actually. But all-time low collection is actually that there are really good individuals everywhere who wish to live in calmness. I check out that a little one inquired, "United States is actually therefore great to various other nations, our company constantly help every person, how can they hate our team so much?".I hope the instance of participation and depend on that this space probe and all the people in the course demonstrate daily are going to someday encourage the remainder of the planet to work the same way. They must!However, our team won't be actually flying over the US during the time people are actually lighting candles. Do not recognize if our company might observe that in any case. Our experts performed, however, observe a quite unique and also stunning attraction a handful of minutes ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz enhancer. Our company were surpassing it and it emerged regarding three minutes after its own launch from Baikonur as the sunlight attacked our station, so it was still unaware. It seemed like a big comet with a straight, wide rear silhouetted versus the dark earth underneath. Even with some bad lighting for some time as the sunshine reached our home window at a low perspective, I dealt with some video recording of it as first our team passed the spacecraft, and after that viewed it begin to mesmerize as it got elevation as well as speed. I filmed till primary engine cutoff and also booster splitting up developed just like our experts approached daybreak on the Himalayas. An extraordinary attraction in a memorable week ...Life goes on, also in space. Our company're listed here to remain ... Frank.